Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Me, myself and I

i'm taking time to find and redefine myself and sometimes don't have time to update the blog so it will be quite random at times but thanks to everyone who took the time and effort to visit it despite there has been no updates for such a long time.

Many thanks goes out to friends that has asked me to continue putting down my thoughts here. Really means a lot to me to have you all being so concerned about me :)

Making a difference - change i am !!!!!

We did some prayers for grandma last weekend and it was a day full of mixed emotions. I was sad and happy and all other emotions mixed into one. I was afraid of being the first one to shed tears because even though it was already a year she still lives so vividly in my heart and mind. Memories of her keep pouring in and it put a smile to my face.

She loved visiting an orphanage in Klang and to continue in her tradition of visiting the place we headed there later that night. We had catered some food for them to have dinner and seeing 40 children who aren't as fortunate as us really touches you deep inside. For once I realised how easy I have things and how I've taken so many things for granted. I'm not sure if it's because of experience or am starting to think about other people other than myself and being less selfish but being around them gave me joy that words just can't describe.

Then I got this link from a dear friend and it immediately triggered feelings and memories especially after the visit to the orphanage.

I remembered the reason for this blog, the reason I wanted to pen down my thoughts and feelings. I wanted to change, I wanted to make a difference. Hopefully I have been doing that and I will continue striving to make a difference and to learn from my mistakes to be a better person for myself and the people around me.

Thanks to everyone for being there when I needed someone to talk to and for showing me that life is indeed beautiful. Many hugs and kisses to my friends and family. May we continue cherishing the memories we have together and continue making a lot more in the future. After all life is always about the journey and having you all around me, makes that journey memorable and worth going through :)

A year has past and you still live strong in our hearts grandma.

I didn't see real sorrow
real pain
I didn't see the world
as really in vain
Before my Grandmother died

I never saw the need for love
nor the God's creation
I never saw for real Nature's
beautiful information
to my eyes
Before my Gran died

Never understood the importance
of really growing up
Never saw the beauty of the sunrise
from the gorgeous mountain top
Before my Grandmother died

I actually experienced it all
The mountains and the dew
As if all of them were given to me
By her, in soul I knew
That when my Grandmother died:

She had given me life
and insight for me to keep
So that I can go to bed every night
and find my peaceful sleep
Cause my Gran never really died

And every morning I think of her
The one, unconditional to who I'll be
And I know that she every day
From heaven is able to see
That she never passed away

Cause she still lives in me!