Monday, November 30, 2009


friends ... who are they and what do they mean ? Everyone has their own interpretation of what a friend means and how to define a true close trustable friend compared to just a friend. This year I started questioning the presence of certain people in my life and I know there are a precious few that I'm extremely grateful for and at the same time those that I'm really close with seem to be the ones that are currently the furthest away from me. Somehow the man upstairs made me meetup with some awesome people this year and also to reconnect with some that I have lost contact with. I tried to be friends with everyone thinking that a friend is better then an enemy but this year I realise that not everyone can be a friend and there are some out there who just need your help/presence for a short moment of time and then they move on.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or! make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.!

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to! accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Mind vs heart

The most interesting thing about the heart transplant is that one completely loses his own heart and be replaced with someone else’s heart yet still has the feelings for the same person he loves. This proves that love works in the minds of people and not in their hearts. You will learn how to forget only if you try doing so.

— Dr. Burke, Grey’s Anatomy

Monday, October 12, 2009

The amazing weekend

It's not every time that I have things planned for the weekend but this time around I'm glad that my weekend turned out the way it did :)

Friday evening
It started out by celebrating some of my colleagues birthday at the office. We usually have this monthly birthday bash and since last month was puasa and raya, we celebrated the birthday for the September and October babies together. As usual there was cake and loads of food. Since I was requested to bring my camera I helped out taking the pictures for the event.

It's amazing how my colleagues love to be in front of the camera and they can take pictures almost the whole evening. Had loads of laughter and fun and it was good to experience the closeness of everyone. Had a dinner appointment in Desa Park city so after cleaning up the office I left to head for my next event of the evening :)

Friday dinner

Was invited to join some friends who are meeting up for our primary school reunion. Some of this people I've never met ever since leaving primary school and I had my doubts but since I knew one or two people who are going I decided to just join since I had nothing else to do anyway. Even though I was late I was the third person there while the rest was even later. Soon one by one they arrived and I didn't even recognise most of them. Then we started looking at our old photos and suddenly faint memories of them returned but very vaguely.

So it was the usual catching up, updating each other on our lives and what we are doing. Glad to know that not everyone is married and some are still enjoying life. At least don't feel so left out and since any jokes that involved age will affect all of us, things werent' so bad. Somehow we started talking about cars, cameras, pr, advertising. Just light stuff but the best part for me was how almost strangers can sit down on the same table and just talk and laugh about stuff. It was nice :) Halfway through dinner got a call from Irene saying that it was a common friends birthday and I was ordered to go there ASAP so just like that I had another venue to be at and the timing couldn't be more perfect :)

The Birthday
I think I can safely say that I was the last one who got there hahaha hey I got the notice quite late also okay. Wished the birthday girl a happy birthday and was introduced to the others that I didn't know. Suprisingly it was a pretty small group, with just 6 or 7 of us. Some faces were familiar because I've seen pictures of them during other group outings but oddly enough the familiar faces were missing hmmmm I thought at least some of those so called regulars would make it a point to celebrate a friend's birthday. Oh well that's something I don't want to dwell into especially right now.

So since I brought along the camera with me, I decided to put it to good use la. So started snapping pictures and then I got tired and sat down and started mingling while Irene took my camera and continued taking pictures. Was talking to Michelle (now I know like 3-4 Michelle's LOL) and realised that she is cheese head and somehow one thing lead to another and I found myself being invited out for dinner next week to wine and dine ... hmmm I'll need to see if the offer still stands or not or was it a spur of the moment thing .. hahahaha

I wasn't planning of ending up being out for so long and wasn't even dressed for the occasion. The freakng shirt I wore was not meant for places with lack proper conditioning and before long I felt myself running around looking for the nearest aircond outlet. I was freaking sweating like crazy hahahaha .. well at least the place was rather quiet and it was just us occupying the space so that gave us a chance to just sit back and relax and have a good time. As usual time flies when you're having a good time so we bid our farewell and I went back home ... tired and exhausted but happy :)

Saturday morning
The family planned a trip to head to PD for the weekend and I couldn't join them for the whole weekend because of a friend's wedding dinner which I cannot miss. So I did the next best thing, followed them there and had fun until the evening where I drove back all the way to KL. I honestly had loads of fun. Didn't know PD could be quite fun especially when you have silly people around :D We ended up going to the ostrich farm where we took loads of pictures and were half afraid to go anywhere near those creatures that were higher than us ... was rather tired after all that but had to rush back to KL.

Saturday evening
Manage to get back in KL on time despite the horrible jam in PD due to the elections. On the way to KL there was this two stupid black cars with Johor plates practically racing on the road, weaving in and out of traffic. About 10-15 mins later there was a sudden crawl and I was hoping that it was them and there was the stupid black camry at the side of the road. Bagus !!!

Rushed home to shower and then rushed back out again to attend a wedding dinner. It was great to meet up familiar faces and catch up with those that I haven't seen in ages. The married couple looked very happy and I'm so happy for the bride for finally finding someone she can spend the rest of her life with. She's a close friend and was always on the lookout for her friends ensuring that people around her are okay. She has since then changed slightly but her happiness means a lot to us so we're happy to see her happy 'nuff said.

Met May and her friend and we started chatting and catching up on the times we've not seen each other. She seems a little stressed with work and all but is planning to continue her studies in Sydney which is great news.

Thursday, October 08, 2009

The track of my tears

A dear friend of mine emailed me this song today and I just smiled. It's just so me. Just made my day. Thanks babe .. huggssssssssssss

Monday, September 28, 2009

Amazing isn't it ....

I find it amazing that even after weeks and months of not speaking to each other the feelings and emotions still linger ... the feeling of dissapointment and love colliding and making it all so confusing ... Being treated like the invisble man is also taking it's toll ... and what's even more amazing is after all this while the water works still turn on at unexpected moments ... why ?? Why do I still feel so strongly for someone that doesn't even acknowledge my existence ? Why do I still think it's something worth fighting for and whatever the issues is, it can be talked about and resolved ... or is it only me who is just hoping and wishing ... to top it all off I've been hearing not so nice things about her .. and to add salt to the open wound .. I also heard she has been saying not so nice things about me ... wow ... it's not enough to get stabbed right in the heart but now the knife is being twisted and turned inside of me ... now isn't that just amazing ??

Monday, September 14, 2009

A phone call

It often is amazing how one phone call can either make or break your today. Today was such a day and this is one phone call I was never expecting and if only I knew who the caller was I would have never even aswered the phone ... arrrgggghhhhhhh ... just feeling really down at the moment ..

After months and years since the last incident .. this person still has the nerve to call and demand that I pay my dues ... excuse me but I think I've done more than I should have in the first place and though I'm not one who can be cold hearted or without empathy but this time around this is just way too much ...

If you need help just ask, don't go around acting all superior and make it sound as though it's my responsibility or duty to bail you out of trouble whenever shit hits the fan ... I've tried to help as much as possible and do the best I can .. yes most that I've done is not in monetary form but is that what you really are looking for ? Isn't sincerity or the willingness to help a person in need much more valueable than that ?? At the end of the day does it all boils down to dollars and cents ?

If it is then I'm sorry ... I have enough of my own problems in that area and don't need you to make me feel like I'm ungrateful for the help I received in the past .. I am and I've never forgotten all that's happened ... I have forgiven you but I've never forgotten how I've been treated as well ... Respect me and the help I've been giving even when I didn't have too .. especially after all that you put me through .. this is where I draw the line .. I have a life and I need to take care of my own situation as well ... I do hope you manage to work things out cause threatening me is definitely not the way ...

Thursday, September 10, 2009


So apparently this was suppose to be a good auspicious day with the date being 09.09.09. Well it certainly did not start that way for me.

Woke up a litte late today and was rushing to get ready to leave for work. As I was about to leave, I got a call from a colleague stating that one of the client's website is still having issues and it was worst than yesterday. I booted up my computer and checked it from home and true enough the webpage barely was loading. Tried some troubleshooting from home and could find no fault with the server or the application. So left home around 9ish am.

As I reached Puchong Bandar Puteri the cars were starting to crawl and I had no idea why there was such a massive jam after 9am. I crawled through the jam for 1hr 30min until the Puchong toll heading towards Cyberjaya. Tooke me another 15-20 mins to reach Cyberjaya. What I heard from colleagues is that apparently there's a burst pipe after the puchong toll heading to cyberjaya which happened early in the morning around 5am-ish .. in the early morning traffic was blocked and diverted somewhere else .. What a lovely way to start the day.

So now to concentrate on the internet issue. From the first day the issue happened we have told the IT support guys that nothing is wrong with the server or the application and it's most likely the Jaring line itself and they need to contact Jaring to find out what's wrong. Instead of listening to me they went about doing their normal troubleshooting cause they are the experts and not me. Fineeeeeeee .. clients complaint it's not my responsibility then.

5 days later after numerous troubleshooting in the server room they finally concluded that nothing is wrong on the network and server side and decided to contact Jaring. Few hours later the issue was resolved. Gahhhhhhhhhhhhh ... god damn proffesionals who can't take a suggestion and instead do it their own way. At least now they will start listening to me more !!!! dumbasssssssssssssssssesssssssssss

So anyway, I was meeting a friend later tonight for dinner and to watch a movie, The Gamer. She won two tickets and asked me to join her. So we reached 1 Utama around 6ish and was collect the ticket at around 7pm. Since it was still early we walked around a bit and we made our way to collect the tickets. We thought we were early but there was already a long queue for the ticket collection. So we queued up and waited our turn when suddenly one her friend appeared and said that we were in the wrong queue and she led us to the correct one. Thank god we were like the 3rd one in the queue hahahaha the other queue was for people to collect ticket from some coupon in The Star.

So we stood there in line chatting away when I suddenly spotted someone familiar in the long queue. I looked again to make sure it was someone I recognised and it definitely was. I immediately turned back and told her that I spotted someone I know and she was like .. who was it and I told her it was an ex-gf ... hahahaha she immediately turned around and asked where where ?!?!?! hahahaha so I pointed out and told her which one it was and she kept asking if it's the girl with the old man ??? hahahaha I said what old man ?? So I turned around and told her which one it was and she said yeah la that girl with the old man .. I immediately broke down laughing hahahaha .. she asked me if I was upset and I said nope .. it's been ages since I've met her .. almost 2 years or more in fact ... she kept telling me how lucky I am to not be involved with someone like that anymore .. after all it's her loss !!! hhahahahah what a wonderful friend I have :D So anyway my-ex walked by us in our line and I just said hi and introduced my friend to her .. they said hi and she didn't even introduce her bf ... hahahhaha ... I wonder whyyyyyyyyyyyy .... LOL

So after collecting our ticket we made our way to Friday's where we shared a meal coz none of us felt like having a full meal. While being shown to our seat I saw the most beautiful sight ever. A family of 6-7 sitting down and having dinner. What's so amazing about it ? Well it was because it was a family of different races sitting down together to buka puasa. It was just beautiful to see a family with different religion and culture being together. So we had our dinner and then made it up for the movie. It was a little dissapointing though. Great effects and sounds but the story line just sucks.

So that ends the interesting day I had ... 09.09.09 ... indeed was a day full of surprises !! hahahahah

So after such a long hiatus, I find myself in the same situation I always do. Heartbroken and alone .. hahahahaha the story of my life. Haven't blogged in ages because of certain circumstances and now since that circumstances has changed I can once again start penning down my thoughts and experiences through my so called life .. so look out for more updates !!! :D

Also thanks to certain friends who have been pushing me to update my blog .. your request made a difference .. eh so interesting meh read my blog ?? :P hahahahahah