Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Goodbye 2010

Somehow 2011 doesn't seem like it has begun yet and as I sit and think about 2010, I decided that the best way to remember it would be to write it down. So here I am trying to capture 2010 in a couple of words/paragraphs and I once again find myself staring at an empty page. It's been a very interesting year and a very interesting journey and it has led me down path/places I never would imagine and it allowed me to meet some amazing new people, reconnect with some old friends and strengthen the ties with those that matter.

I started the year with very little expectations and it was one of the most peaceful and relaxing year I've experienced. My two favourite phrases were "It's okay" and "What's the point". It has helped me through many difficult decisions. I've managed to treat my life as an experiment and opened up to possibilities and suggestions. I've done something I've found so hard to do previously; I forgave myself and stopped blaming myself for all the things I couldn't change or do anything about. That alone was a huge burden off the shoulders and knowing no matter what experience or outcome a certain path or decision takes me "It's okay" because eventually I'll wind up where I'm suppose to be ... eventually.. though I might take the longer way to get to the same destination, it's always the journey that matters and not so much the destination and the people that comes along the way to share and experience that journey.

There were only a few new year resolutions that I made in 2010 and one of them was to spend more time with my friends and to a certain extent I believe I have managed to do that. Also manage to enjoy holidays that doesn't have an itinerary or concrete plan. I became less uptight and less of a perfectionist. It was amazing. Sitting around lazing at the beach felt right and peaceful. I guess I found a way to make peace with myself and gain control of my own demons.

I've also manage to not let the little stuff get to me. Things that people do or don't do ... things people say or don't say .. some of them mean what they say .. some of them don't .. for some it's just words and empty promises .. for some it's a pact and words are all they have to show their sincerity. People come in all different characters and no one is ever the same. If ever I felt insulted, hurt,angry, agitated, disappointed with certain people or actions all I had to do was ask myself "What's the point ?" and after that the world doesn't seem to be such a bad place after all.

The other resolution was to reconnect with certain individuals that have drifted away and mend certain relationships/friendships with people who at one time or another mattered so much to me and I had a ball spending time with them. I manage to keep in touch with most of them and in fact have even started hanging out and we still continue to have an awesome time. I was truly thankful and grateful.

I learned so much about life, the universe and expectations in general from an amazing woman. She thought me how happiness can only start from within and depending externally for it will often lead to disappointment. I actually enjoyed spending time on my own doing my own stuff and sometimes find it irritating when I have to leave the comforts of my home and head out to do chores or meet people :D I think I've been enjoying my alone time so much that having to share it with someone became an issue.

If I were to jot down every moment, memories, lessons, experiences I've gone through in 2010 I could probably start a novel so I'll just leave it at that and would like to thank each and everyone that has spent 2010 together with me. It could have been for a brief moment in time, it could have been for a reason,purpose, it could be that I was meant to help you on your journey through life and vice versa and we continue on our own paths. I treasure each and every moment spent and trust me when I say I'm grateful for each and everyone that has appeared or disappeared in 2010. Without any of you around it wouldn't have been the same and I wouldn't be the person I am today. Thank you. Thank you for the time spent listening to me and offering advice and despite the fact sometimes I don't follow those advice I still appreciate them. Let's welcome 2011 with open arms and welcome all the possibilities and memories it brings to us. A simple word like Yes can change our life's forever :)

I've learned ....

I’ve learned that no matter how much you suffer, the world won’t stop because of you.
I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you, all you can do is let yourself be loved. The rest depends on the others.
I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, others just may not care….
I’ve learned that it takes years to win someone’s trust, and seconds to lose it.
I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter WHAT you have, but WHOM you have in your life.
I’ve learned that charisma is useful for maybe fifteen minutes. After that, it would be nice if you actually knew something.
I’ve learned that you should not compare yourself to others and what they can do better than you, but what counts is what you can do.
I’ve learned that it doesn’t matter what [difficult situation] people go through; what matters is what you do to help them get through their hardtimes….
I’ve learned that ‘it cuts both ways’.
I’ve learned that warm good-byes are important, it might be the last time you see that person.
I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you say you can’t take it anymore.
I’ve learned that heroes are those who do what needs to be done when it needs to be done, no matter the consequences.
I’ve learned that there are people who love you, they just don’t know how to show it.
I’ve learned that when I’m mad, I have the RIGHT to be mad, but NOT THE RIGHT TO BE MEAN.

I’ve learned that true friendship continues long distance. This is also valid for true love.
I’ve learned that if someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to love you, it doesn’t mean that they don’t love you with all their heart.
I’ve learned that no matter how good a friend is, they may hurt you once in a while, and you have to forgive them !!
I’ve learned that it’s not always enough to be forgiven by others; sometimes you have to forgive yourself.
I’ve learned that the past and the circumstances you found yourself in may influence your character, but YOU are the one who is responsible for what you BECOME.
I’ve learned that if two people fight, it doesn’t mean that they don’t love each other. The fact that they don’t fight, doesn’t prove that they love each other.
I’ve learned that sometimes the person is more important than his/her actions.
I’ve learned that two people can look at the same thing and see something totally different.
I’ve learned that no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves will get far in life.
I’ve learned that your life can be changed in a few hours by people who may not even know you.
I’ve learned that even when you believe that you have nothing more to give, when a friend calls, you will find the strength to help him (her).
I’ve learned that writing, like speaking, can heal pain.
I’ve learned that those whom you care about the most are taken away from you the quickest.
I’ve learned that I must love in order to be loved.